Greased lightning

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Photo by Ali Pazani from Pexels

Every time I hear a clap of thunder, I seem drawn to go outside. That isn’t a particularly good idea, since we had a nearby lightning strike while I was away during the summer – think tall tree flattened, just missed the house. It’s not even raining out. It was earlier, and it probably will again, but it is the rain that I crave, soaking myself. It was raining this morning when I drove into uni. I didn’t want to get wet then, because I had to teach, but I do now. I have no appointments to make myself presentable for. (Preposition dangled.)

Water today, sometimes fire. Last night it was fire. I wanted to write the email from hell last night, but I restrained myself and sent a polite one to someone else, who I’m hoping sent a more sensible email than my fiery tirade. I’ve been volatile lately, and I need that rain to cool me down. That might explain today’s haiku: In circles, going.

There is also a new Ezzie going live in about 2 hours. I’ve been trying to stagger entries on the same site (TCoA) to catch more readers. This one gets all magical, I think the first time in all three series that magic is overt. Ezzie doesn’t understand it. She isn’t sensitive to the spiritual world, and doesn’t even realize until she’s told that she is having an out of body experience. I think it is actually more than that, but I haven’t really thought it out yet. Tommy has hinted that this may be her means of escape. It may be now or never, because he may be moving to California, and he considers himself her protector.

I don’t know why I’m divulging that information. Perhaps it helps me to talk things out a little, even when almost no one is talking back. It greases the cog that aligns the wheels.

Witchy witch

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I’m generally interested in all things witchy. I can’t admit to being a Pagan/Wiccan in the truest sense of the word, but I have been known to dabble in candlemagick and tarot from time to time. Does that make me a witch? It certainly makes me a Solitary – one who has their own belief system that includes some magick. I was (at one time) pretty good at tarot – that is, reading the cards as a whole, rather than being expert at knowing every potential meaning and symbol of every card. I once gave a surprisingly accurate prediction, based on completely mis-reading a certain card. It shows (to me at least) how much of tarot is based on instinct.

My problem – and that is what makes me a Solitary – is that I abhor any kind of fanaticism. I go to church and find what was once a very comfortable Catholicism has become evangelical and a little too happy-clappy for me. People have added so much to what I know to be the core faith (without any basis in scripture) – gestures, genuflecting at the slightest provocation (communion), raising your hands to God during the Lord’s Prayer, and higher during “for thine is the kingdom, the power …”. These mean nothing to me, so I don’t do it, but I do feel out of place at times for not participating. In fact, where I feel most comfortable is sitting with the band/choir on holidays, able to participate only at a minimum level impeded by my horn in my hands. The dogma has left me, and with the conservative leaning of the church over the past 40 years, it leaves me further behind.

It is more than just Roman Catholicism, of course. Any happy-clappy religion disgusts me, including hard-core Paganism. I don’t celebrate the Pagan holidays – I don’t know what many of them stand for, if truth be told. All I do know is that many Christian (and other monotheistic) religions base their ritual on some of these holidays – Passover and Easter are around the Vernal Equinox. Christmas and Hanukkah are around the Winter Solstice. Ritual is usually based around breaking of bread and drinking of wine, fruits of the harvest. Coincidence? Hell, no!

I celebrate the moon, sun and cosmos, and I prefer to worship (if that is what you call it) at a more elemental level, communing with the spirits (or spiritual forces) directly. No matter how one dresses it up, that is what religion does at its most basic level. I believe we are here for a reason – for a higher purpose, as it were – and that our universe has some sort of intelligent design, perhaps not of a supreme being (or beings), but of that force of spirit or natural law (my single God/Goddess).  For me, he/she is a union of genders – the spark of creation, the big bang. That spirit flows in all of us, everything, sentient or not. Credo in unum Spiritum.

The universe is a complex place, and we are all part of its continuum.